Thinking Teaching Creating

Thoughts, Tips, Ideas, and Projects from a Creative Teacher Mama

Being A Mom (of BOYS) Has Made Me A Better Teacher

Now, before you get offended if you aren’t a parent, I don’t think that only parents can be good teachers, nor do I think that mothers of girls are inferior in any way.  Also, many of these can absolutely be true with girls too, I’m just seeing them through the eyes of a mom of boys who is also a teacher.  Being the mother of three (yes, three) boys has certainly been an education in just what boys are like.

I used to get really annoyed when my students couldn’t sit still, constantly fidgeted with everything they could get their hands on, and more.  And honestly, I noticed that it was most frequently boys who fit this description.  As my oldest son ages, I have become much more tolerant and understanding of these behaviors.  Boys are different, and that’s ok.  I always knew that, but I feel like I have a much better understanding of that now, and that will only improve as my little guys grow.  This isn’t about giving boys a pass to do whatever they wish, but giving the largely female world of educators some information about boys.

Here are some things I have learned about boys from my sons (they are all 5 years old and younger at the time of writing this):

  • Boys need far more movement and action than I ever guessed!
  • ANYTHING can be transformed into a toy gun with a little imagination.
  • Boys (mine at least), want to be heroes.  Playing where someone is the hero means someone needs to be the bad guy, and there will be battles.  As a teacher, I don’t mind non-touching battles.  The moment there’s touching, that game is over for the day.
  • Given the right story (or non-fiction topic), boys can be mesmerized by a book too.
  • Sometimes boys need to cry too.
  • The words “diaper” and “fart” are hilarious. Use at your own risk.
  • Beware of loopholes in your rules and instructions.  (Don’t hit your brother in the face can be misunderstood as meaning it’s ok to hit other parts of his body since not hitting his face was specifically mentioned.)
  • The words “don’t” or “stop” preceding what you want them to quit doing only make them want to do whatever it was even more.  Instead of, “Don’t throw things!” try, “We put things down gently when we’re finished with them.”
  • The answer to the question, “Why did you _______?” is typically answered with either, “I don’t know,” or “Because.”  Often the real reason is either that it was an impulsive response that they didn’t think through, or it was just to see if they could do it.  If it was impulsive, he probably feels really badly about it, and he might be able to tell you where he went wrong and why he shouldn’t have done it, but (despite his promises to never do it again) he’s probably going to do it again…soon.
  • Automatic, impulsive responses are going to happen…a lot (especially with younger boys).
  • The reason to destroy something is either a) to see what’s inside,  b) to see if you can put it back together afterwards, or c) both.
  • Boys do things rather than talk about them.  That’s not to say boys won’t talk your ear off, but expect action to occur before any discussion about little things like getting permission for something.
  • If he knows you care about him and are trying to help him, a boy will move mountains for you.

I am certainly not saying that if a boy is being disruptive or disrespectful that you should say, “Boys will be boys,” and call it a day.  I’m merely sharing some of the things I’ve noticed happen with my sons to give you a little bit more insight on what many boys are naturally like.  Knowing where they’re coming from can help to give a little extra patience and help you to determine the best way to help him to do what he needs to, whether that’s getting his work accomplished, paying attention to the lesson, or treating his classmates appropriately.

My oldest son will start kindergarten next month, and I really hope his teacher is understanding of the fact that he is ALL boy!

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